Dear Matilda Mae

Dear Matilda Mae

I can't believe it's been one year already. 2nd February 2014 marks 1 year since you died.

I remember the night I came across your wonderful mummy Jennies blog. It was a couple of days after she had found you asleep in your cot, never to open those beautiful eyes again.

I had only joined Twitter the week before and was fumbling my way around trying to understand how it all worked.

Your mummies post stopped me in my tracks.

That night I sat and read her post about the night you died https://www.edspire.co.uk/year_2013/02/04/dear-matilda-mae-the-night-we-found-you-sleeping/

You had simply gone to bed that night and never woken up again-tragically taken by SIDS

I cried as I read your mummies words-absolutely broken hearted for her.

I could only imagine the pain she and your daddy David must be feeling.

SIDS is at the forefront of every parents mind and we all pray that our family will never be affected by it.

Here I was sitting in the dark reading about and seeing a beautiful baby who was no longer with her family anymore-taken far too soon.

I wanted to reach out and let your mummy know I was thinking of her, as did hundreds of other mums on twitter.

We all left comments of support and love and if just one of us could make a wish and bring you back to your family, I know we would wish it in an instant.

In the days after your death my children would quite often find me weeping as I read another of your mummies posts.

'Why are you crying mum?' they would ask.

I showed them your photo and explained what had happened to you. They both looked horrified and said, 'why do things like that happen mum? She looks so cute and such a happy baby!'

I told them about your brother and sister, William and Esther.

They said they must be feeling very sad too as they would if their baby sister wasn't here anymore.

My eldest son Jack suggested sending something to Esther and William to cheer them up. I told them I had read that they both loved trains.

Immediately they both ran upstairs and came back down with their Thomas the Tank Engine books and asked me if they could post them to your brother and sister to make them feel a little happier.

I was so proud of them. We wrapped the books up and posted them off to William and Esther and your mummy told me that they loved them and made her read them over and over.

You did that baby Tilda. You touched my Childrens' hearts just as you have touched many people's hearts since you grew your angel wings.

So many things on many occasions have made me think of you and your beautiful smile Matilda Mae

Every time I see bubbles-I think of them as kisses coming up to the sky to you-just as Esther and William do.

When I light a candle I think back to the candles I lit on your birthday and the day of your funeral and during the other anniversaries your mummy mentioned.

Every time I see pink and purple stars I picture your cheeky smile.

I've donated money myself and I've bought items to help raise money in your name.       Every day I give free advice to mummies who need it with their babies. So many have asked me what they can do to thank me and I have been directing them to your mummies Just giving page.

https://www.justgiving.com/matildamae

So many people have raised so much money for The lullaby trust and Bliss in your name in the last year and I wanted to do my bit to help too

To let your family know that your name and legacy lives on in the hearts of so many people and always will.

You will NEVER be forgotten Matilda Mae Rest in peace sweet angel